Love and Death

After my father passed away last month, my brother, John Eade,  wrote his thoughts about how to cope with the death of a loved one.  I thought it may be helpful for others if I posted it here:
In the past few months I have had a relationship with death, one that was painful, scary and unwanted. Having to put my dog down of 18 years whom I love very much, watching my dad pass away, but only wishing we could have spent more time together  over the years as father and son, yet finding  peace knowing we shared an unspoken love over the years that we both knew and understood. And, finally, having to watch my mother-in-law slowly pass in front of my eyes each day as death closed in. Yes, I have watched death as an unwanted guest in my life but rejoice in the fact that I could give all the things I could to our loved ones to comfort them, not only with my words but with my touch and understanding of how scared and needing of love and support that a person in that position needs, to have somehow a peace of mind in this process. I watched my wife get up at all hours of the night every night and do everything she could to take care of and comfort her mother who, at times, could be difficult, but she marched on time after time and let love be her guide and followed her heart in what she knew was not only the right thing to do, but what she herself needed to do to be close to her mom and share whatever kind of love she could receive from her that she so desperately needed. As a glimpse into the future I understand that it’s a life cycle and these pains are an unavoidable part of  life and that they are something that everyone at one point in their life will have to deal with. I reflect on what life I might leave behind and realize that, in this world, we always have to treat those who are close to us as if it was our last day on this earth. You ask what is the meaning of life and I say I was lucky to have witnessed it in mine with my wife’s dedication to her mother and that is to love is the true value of what someone does in this world.

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